March 17 - You Can't Judge a Book by Its Cover!
Last Updated on Sunday, 30 December 2012 15:00
Computer virus! When you see those two words, what do you think? Something good…or something bad? Most individuals would probably say “bad” without much hesitation, but I would caution you, for things in life are not always as they first appear.
A few days ago, I received an email from a close friend of mine since high school days. Somehow with the thousands of towns and cities around the world, we both ended up in Atlanta at the same time. The message stated that she had received my email but had been unable to download the attachment because her computer virus scanning program had rejected it as infected.
I had not sent her an email in months. So obviously one of those viruses had hijacked my address and tried to infect her computer in the process. In the same email she mentioned how long it had been since we had seen each other, and she invited me to dinner at her home.
I had not seen her for a long time, so I was excited to respond with a resounding “Yes!” I also added that I had not sent her the email; and therefore, I was delighted to know she had not been able to open the infected file. However, I was truly grateful for the connection that the virus had inadvertently created. So in this case, “computer virus” had come to mean something very, very wonderful!
We spent the evening catching up on old times. Many, many years have passed in the blink of an eye, yet except for a few wrinkles here and there (my wrinkles, not hers!!) plus a lot of wisdom acquired over the years, we could be the same two schoolgirls giggling over life and our eyes filling up with tears over our heartbreaks. Her brother unexpectedly died at a much too early age a short time ago after battling addiction most of his life. I felt the void, and I missed his heartbeat in her life. We sat on the sofa relaxed in a life of friendship and support, wondering how we moved from discussing boyfriends to Medicare! While there were decades when we didn’t see each other, every time we do it is as if we have never been apart.
It was she who spoke up in 1979 when I was drowning in my own addiction. She told me she loved me but couldn’t be with me anymore as long as I was drinking. Seeing me like that hurt her heart…she was embarrassed for me. She said that she would support me in my recovery, but she had to move away from my addiction. When I first heard her words, I was angry and would have told you that she was being mean to me.
Yet a few days later I checked myself into the hospital and have not found it necessary to take a drink of alcohol since that time. So once again, what I at first thought was a “bad” thing, turned out to be a truly sacred moment in my life. Her words so many years ago were a significant part of why it was possible for me to sit on that sofa with her tonight, truly connected to her, truly connected to life...and to all of its delightful possibilities.
Are you able to live this moment without any judgment? Are you willing to focus on listening to life with curiosity instead of judging something either bad or good? What might you have judged today? What might you see if you set that judgment aside and looked at the experience with new eyes? Are you willing to move past the cover and look deep inside for that which truly matters?